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Technical Transference or Cultural Adaptation: Songs in Translation
By Giovanna Summerfield
ABD, University of Florida
French Instructor at Auburn University
gasummer@ufl.edu
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Werner Winter has defined the work of
a translator as the work of an artist who is
asked to create an exact replica of a marble
statue but who cannot secure any marble.
The challenges
and frustrations are indeed great, and these
might be doubled in size when the translator
has to work with song lyrics for these represent
a crossover between oral and written genre.
As Hervey tells us, the translator will have
to start with a recorded ST in an oral medium,
then transfers it to the use of written transcript,
and ultimately composes a TT which has to be
a script suitable for oral performance.
The sound
is a matter of primary concern: it is steadily
in ones ears, not merely on the back of
ones mind. Because of this, the translator
cannot render a faithful word-by-word
translation of the original. He has to compromise,
offering after the proper sacrifice, compensation,
and cultural transposition, a balanced rendition
in the target language, one that can either
make the audience believe that the words they
are hearing are the words which the composer
actually set or a translation which
enjoys or enjoyed the status of an original
ST in the target culture.
The latter
is known as covert translation,
the one Rosalino Cellamare, alias Ron, gives
us after having worked on the notes and lyrics
of Jackson Brownes The Road. When his
rendition made its apparition in the Italian
market in the early 80s, the public was not
aware of the songs background and took
it at face value as the new creation of this
young songwriter who presented it with seven
other songs in his LP entitled Una Citta
per Cantare. First of the group, this covert
translation gives away Rons optimistic
view of a dedicated musician life, matching
once again the image he has created for himself.
It does not match the effect, tone, and purpose
of Jackson Brownes original text, labored
and delivered in the 70s in a post-Vietnam America.
This represented
indeed my first challenge, as editor and critic
of Rons rendition. Firstly, I could not,
then and now, take it as an original for I knew
Jackson Brownes text; secondly I was quite
aware of both cultures and situations and found
difficult to accept some free renditions
which totally corrupt main concepts
and problems of the American generation, the
pop culture, and the author himself. If Ron
gives us a crescendo of optimism, love for music,
pain-free cuts and fresh starts, Brownes
album (Running on Empty) is a crescendo of frustration
in the realms of love and music, picturing life
as this constant move on the road that the author,
as any other pop star, has to endure.
After a
momentary panic and disappointment, I had to
admit that the Italian equivalence is, in spite
of some inconsistency which I will soon uncover,
a good work of art for it summarized the main
original objectives, tailors them to the Italian
market and the individual figure of the singer,
and redeems itself with a year 2000 performance
where the two authors, Ron and Browne, sing
together, sharing stanzas, and even switching
languages (the mystery is finally revealed and
responsibility is taken: bravo, Ron). Thus,
according to Nida, we are dealing with a dynamic
equivalence, one that cares about the
response of the receptor. This response can
never be identical, for the cultural and historical
settings are too different, and, I should add,
the image of the performer is also at stake.
Ron was
fully aware of the fact that everyone looked
(and looks) at him as the boy next-door and
that the Italian culture could not easily accept
any product that supports a lascivious conduct
of life, of abandonment to heavy drugs, sex,
and desperation which Jackson Browne so naturally
describes in his text. His cocaine afternoons
become for Ron and the Italian audience a very
ambiguous fumarti il pomeriggio,
which denotes either the smoking of a cigarette
in the afternoon, the wasting of an afternoon,
or even, in a very restricted jargon for Italian
youth, a smoke of marijuana.
Following
the same philosophy and cultural dictates, the
naughty girls in the back seat of daddys
cars disappear or rather transform themselves
into girls who cannot offer anything
to anyone who does not enjoy good reputation,
income, and a certain prestige. Finally the
life of the artist turns from the insecure,
nostalgic nights spent on the bus or inside
hotel rooms into the lively life of huge stages,
underlined by an interaction of fans and vedette,
and his attempts to please them more than himself.
But as
with any man-made creation, perfection is impossible
to attain. Ron decides, in fact, to leave some
cues that are of primary importance in Brownes
text but that create problems and generate confusion
amongst the Italian listeners within the renewed
structure of the text Ron now proposes. The
first example is given by the hotel rooms
which are at the core of the ST, for all songs
in Brownes album were recorded in hotel
rooms, and they also indicate the restriction
and solitude of the soul of the author in contrast
with the road that opens in front of him. Ron
mentions vecchi alberghi twice:
the first time, they are presented to the audience
as trasformati; the second time
they are dimenticati.
The Italian
audience is puzzled by these concepts: what
is the meaning of these two lines? Usually concerts,
public representations, recordings (especially
the ones of Ron in the 80s, who was always followed
by a vivacious and variegated band with artists
of national caliber, i.e. Lucio Dalla and Francesco
de Gregori) are done in arene, which
is the word I chose coupled by autostrade,
which are the ones that take you from one city
to the other, instead of Rons grandi
strade. In Italy there are no big roads,
and if one is talking about the medium-sized
country roads, these are certainly not able
to take you outside of the city or region.
The second
inconsistency is the maintained word luna,
which again is a key term in Brownes text,
in contrast with the stars (his dreams, the
unreachable), but which pops up only once in
Rons Italian rendition, when he compares
it with the faces of the girls the author has
met along the way. The response of the public
is again one of confusion.
The third
inconsistency, one that this time Ron introduces
personally, showing in fact no adherence to
the original text, is the twice repeated canti,
smetti e canti, and provi, smetti
e provi. This linking device, positioned
just before the refrain, proves to be faulty
for along the text the author has claimed that
he never wants and can stop: yet he stops twice,
once to sing, and once to test the songs prior
to his public performance.
Two couples
of much healthier triplets would be, according
to me, canti, sogni e canti, and
consistently and coherently, provi, sogni
e provi, which will also restore the struggle
the author has to endure between reality and
dreams.
These few
changes, together with some more subtle ones,
as, for example, some wording in the refrain,
some verbs here and there to better tie the
authors willingness to please others on
one side, and his agony to reach happiness on
the other, were not easy for me due to the criteria
followed by both songwriters regarding the songs
rhymes. If one can see consistent 2/4/6/8 pairs
in Jackson Brownes lyrics, Rons
translation turns them into 1/5 2/7 6/8, and
in the following stanza, 2/7 3/6 4/8, to suit
the length of the Italian words and the smoothness
of the musical rendition. I had to be faithful
to his structure. After a preliminary very literary
draft, I had to adjust my vocabulary to his
metrical system, and test it to be able to sing
it with the same elegance, easiness, and sonority
that the TT delivers.
I have
to say that, in spite of the challenges and
frustrations translation work never fails to
create for its committed craftsman, the joy
of that one moment when the translator can finally
look and admire his/her final product is far
too bigger in stature and degree to give up.
Winter is right when he says that an exact replica
of a marble statue seems impossible especially
when one cannot secure the marble and has to
wander around to collect wood, clay, or any
suitable material which could replace and maybe
repeat the effect of the chosen stone. What
he forgets to say is that, after numerous nights
sweating for the physical and mental fatigue,
like Michelangelo, the translator looks at his
creation and in awe says: Talk to me!
He is able to meet, face to face, his voice
within.
MY TRANSLATION
Autostrade e arene
Nuovi testi maturati
Tu scrivi anche di notte
Perche di notte non dormi mai
Buio anche tra i fari
Tra ragazzi come te
Tu canti, sogni e canti
Sai che li accontenterai
Caffe alla mattina
Puoi fumarti il pomeriggio
Si parlera del tempo
Se ce pioggia non partirai
Quante interurbane
Per dire come stai
Raccontare dei successi e dei fischi non parlarne
mai
E quando ti fermi convinto che
Ti si puo ricordare
Hai davanti un lungo viaggio e una citta
per cantare.
Alle ragazze non chieder niente
Perche niente ti voglion dare
Se il tuo nome non e sui giornali
O si fa dimenticare
Lungo la strada
Queste facce diventano una
Che finisci per scordar tutte
Non ti innamori di nessuna
E quando ti fermi convinto che
Ti si puo ricordare
Hai davanti un altro viaggio e una citta
per cantare.
Autostrade e arene
Vecchi testi trasformati
Io non so se ti conviene
I tuoi timori dove sono andati ?
Buia e la sala : devi ancora cominciare
Tu provi, sogni e provi
La canzone che dovrai cantare
E non ti fermi convinto che
Ti si puo ricordare
Hai davanti una canzone nuova e una citta
per cantare.
THE ROAD (Jackson Browne) |
UNA CITTA PER CANTARE (Ron) |
Highways and dancehalls |
Grandi strane piene |
A good song
takes you far |
Vecchi alberghi trasformati |
You write about the moon |
Tu scrivi anche di notte |
And you dream about the stars |
P erche di notte non dormi mail |
Blues in old motel rooms |
Buio anche tra i fari |
Girls in daddys cars |
Tra ragazzi come te |
You sing about the nights |
Tu canti, smetti e canti |
And you laugh about the scars |
Sai che non ti fermerai |
Coffee in the morning |
Caffe alla mattina |
Cocaine afternoons |
Puoi fumarti il pomeriggio |
You talk about the weather |
Si parlera del tempo |
And you grin about the rooms |
Se ce pioggia non suonerai |
Phone calls long distance |
Quante interurbane |
To tell how youve been |
Per dire come stai |
Forget about the
losses, you exaggerate |
Raccontare dei successi e dei fischi non |
the wins |
parlarne mai |
And when you
stop to letem know |
E se ti fermi
convinto che |
Youve got
it down |
Ti si puo
ricordare |
Its just
another town along the road. |
Hai davanti un
altro viaggio e una citta per cantare. |
|
|
The ladies come
to see you |
Alle ragazze non
chieder niente |
If your name
still rings a bell |
Perche
niente ti posson dare |
They give you
damn near nothin |
Se il tuo nome
non e sui giornali |
And theyll
say they knew you well |
O si fa
dimenticare |
So you
tellem youll remember |
Lungo la strada |
But they know
its just a game |
Tante face
diventano una |
And along the
way their faces |
Che finisci per
dimenticare |
All begin to
look the same |
O la confondi
con la luna |
And when you
stop to letem know |
Ma quando ti
fermi convinto che |
You got it down |
Ti si puo
ricordare |
Its just
another town along the road. |
Hai davanti un
altro viaggio e una citta per cantare. |
|
|
Well it
isnt for the money
|
Grandi strade
piene |
And its
only for awhile |
Vecchi alberghi
dimenticati |
You stalk about
the rooms |
Io non so se ti
conviene |
And you roll
away the miles |
I tuoi amori
dove sono andati? |
Gamblers in the
neon, clinging to guitars |
Buia e la
sala: devi ancora cominciare |
Youre
right about the moon |
Tu provi, smetti
e provi |
But youre
wrong about the stars |
La canzone che
dovrai cantare |
And when you
stop to letem know |
E non ti fermi
convinto che |
You got it down |
Ti si puo
ricordare |
Its just
another town along the road. |
Hai davanti una
canzone nuova e una citta per cantare. |
References
1. Werner Winters, Impossibilities of
Translation. The Craft and Context of
Translation. Garden City, New York: Anchor Books,
1964. 93-112.
2. Hervey. Thinking Spanish Translation. London:
Routledge, 1995. 145.
3. W. H. Auden and Chester Kallman as cited
by Joseph Kerman, Translation for Music,
The Cract and Context of Translation. 147-164.
4. Ernst-August Gutt, Translation and Relevance.
Manchester: St. Jerome Publishing, 2000. 47.
5. Nida and Taber as cited by Gutt, 70.
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